BIG WEENIE

I DON'T UNDERSTAND, WHY ARE YOU BEING SO MEAN? YOU'RE A MEAN, MEAN MAN. YOU'RE JUST JEALOUS OF ME CAUSE YOU YOU JUST CAN'T DO WHAT I DO SO INSTEAD OF JUST ADMITTING IT YOU WALK AROUND AND SAY ALL KINDS OF REALLY MEAN THINGS ABOUT ME CAUSE YOU'RE A MEAMIE, (A MEANIE) BUT IT'S ONLY CAUSE YOU'RE JUST REALLY JEALOUS OF ME CAUSE I'M WHAT YOU WANNA BE SO YOU JUST LOOK LIKE AN IDIOT WHEN YOU SAY THESE MEAN THINGS CAUSE IT'S SO EASY TO SEE YOU'RE REALLY JUST A BIG WEENIE, (BIG WEENIE). ALIGHT LISTEN, I NEED YOU TO FOCUS I NEED YOU TO GO DIG DEEP IN YOUR MIND, THIS IS IMPORTANT. WE ARE GOING TO PERFPRM AN EXPERIMENT OF THE SORTS I'M GOING TO HAVE TO ASK YOU TO BEAR WITH FOR A MOMENT. NOW I NEED YOU TO OPEN, YOUR MIND, YOUR EYES CLOSE EM' YOU ARE NOW ABOUT TO BE PLACED UNDER MY HYPNOSIS. FOR THE NEXT FOUR AND A HALF MINUTES WE ARE GOING TO EXPLORE INTO YOUR MIND TO FIND OUT WHY YOU'RE SO FUCKING JEALOUS. NOW WHY DO THEY MAKE YOO-HOO? PIPPITY-KAKA-POOPOO. PSYCHE! I'M KIDDING I JUST WANTED TO SEE IF YOU'RE STILL LISTENING. OK NOW I NEED YOUR UNDIVIDED ATTENTION. SIR, I HAVE A QUESTION, WHY DO I ALWAYS SENSE THIS UNDERNIABLE TENSION, FROM THE MOMENT THAT I ENTER INTO THE ROOM IT GETS ALL QUIET AND WHISPERS? WHENEVER THERE'S CONVERSATION, WHY AM I ALWAYS MENTIONED? I'VE BEEN DYIN' TO ASK, IT'S BEEN ITCHIN' AT ME, IS IT JUST BECAUSE... YOU'RE JUST JEALOUS OF ME CAUSE YOU YOU JUST CAN'T DO WHAT I DO SO INSTEAD OF JUST ADMITTING IT YOU WALK AROUND AND SAY ALL KINDS OF REALLY MEAN THINGS ABOUT ME CAUSE YOU'RE A MEANIE, (A MEANIE). BUT IT'S ONLY CAUSE YOU'RE JUST REALLY JEALOUS OF ME CAUSE I'M WHAT YOU WANNA BE SO YOU JUST LOOK LIKE AN IDIOT WHEN YOU SAY THESE MEAN THINGS CAUSE IT'S SO EASY TO SEE YOU'RE REALLY JUST A BIG WEENIE, (BIG WEENIE). ALRIGHT NOW I, I JUST FLUBBED A LINE I WAS GOING TO SAY SOMETHING EXTREMELY IMPORTANT BUT I FORGOT WHO OR WHAT IT WAS, I FUCKED UP, PSYCHE I'M KIDDING AGAIN YOU IDIOT NO I DIDN'T. THAT'S JUST WHAT YOU WANTED TO HEAR FROM ME IS THAT I FUCKED UP AIN'T IT? BUT I CAN BUST ONE TAKE WITHOUT LOOKING AT NO PAPER IT DOSEN'T TAKE A BUNCH OF TAKES OR ME TO STAND HERE IN THIS BOOTH ALL DAY FOR ME TO SAY THE TRUTH, OK, YOU'RE DROOLING YOU HAVE TOOTH DECAY YOUR MOUTH IS OPEN, YOU'RE DISGUSTING, WHAT THE FUCK YOU EAT FOR LUNCH A BUNCH OF SWEETS OR SOMETHING? WHAT, YOU MUNCH A BUNCH A CRUNCH N' MUNCH? YOUR TOOTH IS ROTTIN' THROUGH THR GUM, YOUR BREATH STINKS WANNA CHEW SOME GUM? YES I DO SIR WHAT AM I ON? YOU SIR ARE ON TRUTH SERUM. MARSHALL I'M SO JEALOUS OF YOU PLEASE SAY YOU WON'T TELL NOBODY I'D BE SO EMBARRASSED I'M JUST ABSOLUTELY TERRIFIED THAT SOMEONE'S GONNA FIND OUT WHY I'M SAYING ALL THESE TERRIBLE, EVIL AND AWFUL MEAN THINGS IT'S JUST MY OWN INSECURITIES. YOU'RE JUST JEALOUS OF ME CAUSE YOU YOU JUST CAN'T DO WHAT I DO SO INSTEAD OF JUST ADMITTING IT YOU WALK AROUND AND SAY ALL KINDS OF REALLY MEAN THINGS ABOUT ME CAUSE YOU'RE A MEANIE, (A MEANIE). BUT IT'S ONLY CAUSE YOU'RE JUST REALLY JEALOUS OF ME CAUSE I'M WHAT YOU WANNA BE SO YOU JUST LOOK LIKE AN IDIOT WHEN YOU SAY THESE MEAN THINGS CAUSE IT'S EASY TO SEE YOU'RE REALLY JUST A BIG WEENIE, (BIG WEENIE). ALRIGHT NOE WE, WE'RE GONNA CONDUCT THAT EXPERRIMENT THAT WE WERE TALKING ABOUT EARLIER JUST TO SEE WHAT A FROG, LOOKS LIKE WHEN HE TAKES TWO HITS OF ECSTASY CAUSE THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT YOUR EYES LOOK LIKE, WANNA CHECK TO SEE? HERE'S A MIRROR, NOTICE THE RESEMBLANCE HERE? WAIT, LET ME PUT THESE SUNGLASSES ON, NOW LOOK IN THIS MIRROR. HOW BOUT NOW? WHAT DO YOU HAVE IN COMMON YOU'EW BOTH GREEN WITH ENVY AND LOOK LIKE IDIOTS WITH SUNGLASSES ON 'EM. YOU LOOK LIKE I SOUND LIKE, SINGING ABOUT WEENIES NOW TAKE MY WEENIE OUT OF YOUR MOUTH, THIS IS BETWEEN ME AND YOU. I KNOW YOU'RE NOT HAPPY I KNOW YOU'D MUCH RATHER SEE ME LYING IN THE CORNER OF A ROOM SOMEWHERE CRYING CURLED UP IN A BALL TWEAKED OUT OF MY MIND DYING THERE'S NO DENYING THAT MY WEENIE'S MUCH BIGGER THAN YOURS IS. MINE IS LIKE STICKING A BANANA BETWEEN TWO ORANGES WHY YOU EVEN DOING THIS TO YOURSELF? IT'S POINTLESS WHY DO WE HAVE TO KEEP ON GOING THROUGH THIS? THIS IS TORTUROUS MY POINT IS THIS THAT IF YOU SAY MEAN THINGS, YOUR WEENIE WILL SHRINK NOW I FORGOT WHAT THE CHORUS IS. YOUR JUST AS... YOU'RE JUST JEALOUS OF ME CAUSE YOU YOU JUST CAN'T DO WHAT I DO SO INSTEAD OF JUST ADMITTING IT YOU WALK AROUND AND SAY ALL KINDS OF REALLY MEAN THINGS ABOUT ME CAUSE YOU'RE A MEANIE, (A MEANIE). BUT IT'S ONLY CAUSE YOU'RE JUSY REALLY JEALOUS OF ME CAUSE I'M WHAT YOU WANNA BE SO YOU JUST LOOK LIKE AN IDIOT WHEN YOU SAY THESE MEAN THINGS CAUSE IT'S SO EASY TO SEE YOU'RE REALLY JUST REALLY JUST A BIG WEENIE, (BIG WEENIE).