OPENING NIGHT

OPENING NIGHT... ... IT'S OPENING NIGHT! IT'S MAX BIALYSTOCK'S LATEST SHOW, WILL IT FLOP OR WILL IT GO? THE CAST IS TAKING ITS FINAL BOW, HERE COMES THE AUDIENCE NOW! THE DOORS ARE OPEN, THEY'RE ON THEIR WAY... LET'S HEAR WHAT THEY HAVE TO SAY! HE'S DONE IT AGAIN, HE'S DONE IT AGAIN, MAX BIALYSTOCK HAS DONE IT AGAIN! WE CAN'T BELIEVE IT, YOU CAN'T CONCEIVE IT... HOW'D HE ACHIEVE IT? IT'S THE WORST SHOW IN TOWN! WE SAT THERE SIGHING, GROANING AND CRYING, THERE'S NO DENYING, IT'S THE WORST SHOW IN TOWN! OH, WE WANTED TO STAND UP AND HISS... WE'VE SEEN SHIT... BUT NEVER LIKE THIS! Max bialystock has done it again! THE SONGS WERE ROTTEN, THE BOOK WAS STINKIN', WHAT HE DID TO SHAKESPEARE BOOTH DID TO LINCOLN! WE COULDN'T LEAVE FASTER... WHAT A DISASTER! WE ARE STILL IN SHOCK, WHO PRODUSED THIS SHLOCK? THAT SLIMEY, SLEAZY MAX BIALYSTOCK! What a bum!!